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Comment by jycool | Hacker News Reader

There is a dark side to the idea of an 'internal locus of control.' It creates a sense that the individual can and should manage the situation, even when the situation is totally unmanageable. I think it's a common problem among high achievers (particularly entrepreneurs), and conversely some 'resilient' people need to accept that there sometimes really IS an external locus of control before their efforts to control the situation break them. Hence the serenity prayer (https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Serenity_Prayer) and major parts of eastern spiritual traditions...

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Epictetus said it well: "There is only one way to happiness and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of our will."

Having an 'internal locus of control' is not incompatible with knowing when circumstances are beyond your control.

Good point, it's very important to have balance and be able to adhere to the "And wisdom to know the difference." part. I do think that it is important to have the experience of having too much 'internal locus of control' in order to get a good feel for that.

Or to think that it doesn't matter what happens externally.

Aurelius says something like "How ridiculous and how strange to be surprised by anything that happens in life." As in, why would external events matter or be a surprise? Things happen. The only thing you can control is how you react to them and what you choose to do about them. That helps me at least. It's all about process, not outcomes. Outcome is a roll of the die, so all you can do is make sure your internal processes are sound.

Yeah, the general idea is good, the specific techniques are limited. It's not really about control, more about Choice. Few people ever truly make choices, and instead, select from a menu of options. That gives the illusion of choice.

As I mentioned in a different comment, there are much better teachings found in wisdom lineages -- and not just ones from Eastern spiritual traditions. There are shamanic initiations one can undertake. There are specific esoteric martial art lineages that instill this as part of the training.

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