What It Feels Like to Freeze on National Television

It's really great that Dr. Habib is talking about this publicly and I think his word "solidarity" is very helpful. If you've ever experienced what he's describing it is baffling and excruciating and the very nature of it is you feel that everyone else is on the other side (not against you, necessarily, but out there watching).

I've experienced this more than once -- the first time when I was in my 20's and on live TV being interviewed about a local community group I was part of. The lights and live camera inexplicably turned my brain to complete mush, despite the fact that the interview was a completely friendly one. I've also had it happen in front of live audiences -- both as a speaker and as a musician.

But here's the interesting thing. I also love being up in front of an audience. I've performed as a professional musician (and dancer) and also given numerous talks. And, speaking of music, there are artists of the highest caliber who've struggled with debilitating performance anxiety.

And it's relevant here on HN. I was in a Founders Institute demo day a few years ago when one of my classmates had exactly this kind of meltdown.

But there really is a lot you can do to get a handle on performance anxiety. It starts with having plenty of practice in pressure situations. And with not being too hard on yourself if you do screw up.

Link to the clip: http://media.smh.com.au/entertainment/entertainment-news/eve...

Story time.

In college, I was called on at the very last minute to host a roundtable sports discussion on the university radio station. Likely listening audience: a million or so. I was freaked out, knew not a thing about sports, and just as we were getting started I asked if we should kick off talking about football - only to be told it was the off-season. I then tried introducing the panel, but blanked on one of their last names. He was my roommate. This is how I felt: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W45DRy7M1no

In my 20s I had a phone interview for a fellowship that would send me to South America, teach me a foreign language, and put me in the company of my idols for two years. During the call, I was struck with such debilitating anxiety I went totally off the rails. It went a lot like this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u0PUrNwvvBk

I spent 10+ years taking meds for anxiety. And I was super lucky that they worked a charm. I'm off meds, and in very good shape, but I know better than to write anxiety off. I'm seasoned at dealing with it, but expect to deal with it for the rest of my life.

We've all been there Dr. Habib.

> I waited there for about twenty-five minutes, absent-mindedly scanning old newspapers while watching the goings-on about the office and repeating what I wanted to say about the North Korean rocket launch over and over in my head.

As someone who is also an introvert struggling to pass as an extrovert at many times (though thankfully not on live TV, thank god), I can offer a little trick that helps to prevent these situations: practice out loud.

It's simple, but effective. When you encounter one of these "freezes" your natural instinctive response is to fall back on what you've practiced -- physically, not mentally. And what you actually practiced, Dr. Habib, is mutely thumbing through newspapers.

What I do when I have a big speech or talk is find some quiet room beforehand and actually practice my speech or talking points out laud, until I have them basically memorized. Then I throw out the notes and give an extemporaneous talk. It always goes different than planned, but when I get stuck my mouth automatically goes to start forming the phrases I had practiced and I get back on track. I get complements and people are super surprised to find out that I'm actually introverted and dread public speaking...

Performers with stage fright have been using beta blockers for year as an off-label treatment for performance anxiety.

A doctor friend of mine passed along a recent NY Times article about how beta blockers may actually be able to cure the autonomous nervous system response and re-train the brain to not panic in otherwise panic inducing situations.

It's very exciting research and it's great to see non-psychoactive drugs used to combat mental issues.

http://www.nytimes.com/2016/01/24/opinion/sunday/a-drug-to-c...

I actually looked at the video and dont really think he did that bad. I mean it was obvious that he was having trouble putting his thoughts out there, but it wasnt like he was just completely mute. Relating to my experience, Im not ever on TV, but lack of sleep(meaning anything less than say, 7 hours) severely impacts my overall anxiety level. I am the kind of person that cant skip a night of sleep. I feel awful and unless something is absolutely necessary, like surviving, I call it a day and try to get some sleep. Either way, it was great of him to write about the experience.

This happened to me recently at a contract job I had about 6 months ago during a phone call to introduce myself to the team. In the middle of my sentence, I just lost every ounce of thought and suddenly became hyper aware of my exact scenario. It was one of the more frightening things I've experienced in recent times. Thankfully, one of my coworkers killed the silence after ten seconds with a few questions.

I think the biggest problem for me is that the field I'm in, despite being in technology, seems to favor outward personality types and views social phobia as a strong weakness. Even mentioning issue feels like it has potential enormous career growth impact. The most recent job I worked for, it got to the point where I actually went to HR and talked to them about it, including the ADD/hypomania comorbids. Absolutely nothing came from it, which only furthered my thoughts on others' appreciation for mental health.

I saw a comment yesterday saying that we're going through a positive mental health phase shift now, but I'm seeing the exact opposite. I see a large amount of "othering" towards those with mental health issues. For what it's worth, a majority of the HN type personalities I've met over the years are just as guilty of this.

Long winded response, but this is something that I can quite personally relate to.

My senior year of college I was tasked with giving a presentation on an entire semesters worth of work to the class, no problem - except the catch was that you weren't allowed to have any notes with you. I'd never had an issues with presenting or speaking in front of audiences before, a little bit of nerves like most people, but nothing more than that. Well the day of the presentation comes and in my mind I knew ahead of time that it wasn't going to go well - I'd never given a talk to a class with no notes and I had convinced myself that without something to reference I was going to screw up. Well 30 seconds or so before it's my time to speak I begin to get the fight or flight response and start to have a panic attack - mind goes blank, heart literally pounding, I'm frozen. I don't really remember what I said, but I remember spouting off a lot of "umms" and "fucks". It sucked.

I eventually got over that embarrassing moment, but I'm convinced that I've now actually taught myself how to easily have a panic attack during moments that trigger even the slightest bouts of performance anxiety. Conference calls, medium-sized meetings, you name it, my body triggers an anxiety response - something that I never had a problem with before, it's debilitating, and I fear that it's holding me back in life.

The only thing that works for me (that i know of) is taking beta-blockers when I know ahead of time that I may be "in the spotlight" discussing or presenting something at work. They work wonders and really silence the physical responses that the body produces that are ultimately the catalyst of a panic attack, but the effects don't last veery long. So unless I'm popping pills all day, I'm basically always on-guard and fearful of those impromptu situations that pop-up where I could be called upon to speak - an "unmedicated" me could easily freeze-up slip into panic mode.

I sympathize with Dr. Habib and I'm wondering if anyone else on HN is in a situation similar to me and how they're coping, treating or hopefully curing it.

I've been know to freeze up on occasion, especially in front of a camera. Yikes!

I've found practice does help. I scribble down a bunch of notes on what I might say, then record myself with my webcam reading the notes. Surprisingly I'm nervous even doing this exercise. Then I watch the payback and repeat until I'm somewhat comfortable.

I once went to a New Years Dinner near DC, and the dinner was full of political types, and I got a hot tip about dealing with certain kinds of performance anxiety. I was seated next to a woman who had spent her career as a nurse, and she had been called several times to testify before Congress regarding the way changes in Medicare might effect patient care. She said she learned that when she entered the Congressional hall, the lights and cameras were overwhelming, so she learned to take something to read, a magazine or perhaps any prepared statement she had, and she would hold it before and concentrate on it, keeping it down, and keeping her head down. She focused on the paper instead of focusing on the cameras. She would walk past the cameras that way. When she got to the table where she would sit, all the lights and cameras were behind her. Then she would look up at the Senators, but the Senators themselves were usually friendly, and they seemed like normal humans, so she felt less fear when facing them.

I once saw on TV a well-known singer telling about the day he was performing a famous Frank Sinatra song and forgot the words to the opening line. In Las Vegas. With Frank Sinatra himself in the audience.

Fittingly, I'm drawing a complete blank on the singer's name :-)

ETA: Ah! Wikipedia comes through for me. It was Harry Connick, Jr. (I just pulled up male pop singers and scanned the list. I remembered the guy was a "Jr.") -- Aha! Here's a video clip [0] of him talking about it -- though I don't think this is the same one I saw. Okay, I had some of the details wrong. Anyway, there it is.

[0] http://theweek.com/speedreads/589588/harry-connick-jr-met-fr... -- starts at 2:49

I often wonder how many high-profile speakers are prescribed anxiety medications or use similar supplements. To stand in front of thousands without some control over the adrenaline response is beyond me.

When you practice a particular talk or presentation, you have to practice handling the freeze. Too many people think they have to practice just to get the sequence or even exact words right.

No. You practice in front of a group, as contrived as it may be, and you have them shut up, and you give your whole talk. And you get used to the feeling of icicles going through you. You learn to breath through them and get familiar with how long they last. The fact is, you are riding inside an incredible machine, and it will pump itself full of crazy chemicals when you put it on stage. You can't let their power surprise you.

Edit: All that said, I'd offer my solidarity to Mr. Habib as well. I've certainly frozen up worse myself, and in much less high pressure settings.

The good news is that in a few thousand trillion years, when the last few remaining atoms are getting ready to break down, when the universe is a cold, distant memory, and everyone you ever knew and loved is long gone - this interview won't matter all that much.

This guy is very brave. I can see that he clearly doesn't want to really talk about this, and in fact he says as much, but this post gives him dignity and acknowledges a problem that can happen (and happens!) to many people.

In Australia, there are a lot of organisations trying to help de-stigmatize mental health disorders and illnesses. We still have a very "she'll be right" culture, which meant that men in particular have hidden their inner turmoil and not dealt with their mental health issues. But lately we have had a national conversation around this. Things that have helped:

* We made Patrick McGorry Australian of the Year. Patrick is Professor of Youth Mental Health at the University of Melbourne and has been very influential in studying and improving early intervention services for youth experiencing mental health problems.

* The ABC put out Mental Health Week, which was great as it allowed a national conversation around mental health

* Governments, whilst still largely failing at providing adequate mental health services, are at least starting to provide more funding and get real about this issue. Even Tony Abbott, who I have almost no respect for, increased funding for mental health even though he decimated the budgets of pretty much every other department.

* Andrew Robb, a senior minister in the Abbott and Turnbull governments, had a very bad case of depression and took time off with the bi-partisan support of all sides of politics. He has been one of the LNP's most effective ministers (whilst I can't stand the TPP, it is probably true that he is the most effective Trade Minister this national has ever had) and has shown that you can have mental health problems and still be effective in the workplace.

* The Black Dog Institute and Beyond Blue have really made in-roads into mental health awareness. Both organisations are there solely to advocate and increase awareness of mental health issues. Beyond Blue (though they've had problems internally in the past) has an incredibly effective spokesman, Jeff Kennett. Kennett was one of the most successful (and highly controversial) Premiers of the state of Victoria. When he speaks, people in power tend to listen, and he has been very vocal.

* Just yesterday the Victorian Police Commissioner has finally admitted that mental health issues in the Victorian Police Service are at the top of his list in terms of matters that must be addressed. He actually admitted that the suicide rate is alarming, which 6 suicides of police officers this year, of which 2 happened in the last two weeks.

* With a mental health plan, you can get 10 free visits a year to a psychologist. This is extremely helpful, especially for those on lower incomes.

That said, we have a long way to go. Frankly, health services are not funded correctly. In NSW, Cumberland Hospital (which I was once admitted to overnight) is a degrading, disintegrating and appalling institution. It is one in which I will never allow myself to be admitted to ever again.

I am hopeful, however, that Australia as a nation is finally maturing about our understanding of mental health problems. It's honestly good news, and one which all sides of politics are really trying to address.

Fuck, that sounds horrible. Glad he wrote it up.

What is "National Television"?

I think this kind of thing (I choose to call it stage fear) has a life of its own. I describe some phases of it in my life:

Absence of it: Up to some point in your life its not there at all. I remember in our school, we used to have a teacher's day. I which teachers would take rest, and students from higher classes would go and teach junior classes. Per student you were required to take 3 classes. And I remember going to all three of them, totally free and un-encumbered. And did that with flying colors, in my opinion. At that stage in life, I didn't know what stage fear was, as it was totally absent. I call it the innocent phase.

Onset and very acute straightaway: When I was in college. I came from a background where we had good written English, but didn't have fluency in speaking. And I think that made me very self conscious in my new environment. There were occasional hiccups in conversation in English, in a very friendly setting, but I felt very embarrassed. And although everyone is rather kind, but it led to some people slotting me, and they would choose to talk to me in Hindi, the next time, and it was all in good intent, without malice. But you can imagine, what kind of effect it had on me. I began dreading things like any project presentations in front of the class. Stopped asking questions in the class. And of course camouflaged all of this very well - by trying to carry a non-caring air. Hey I was a 20 year old then.

Working on it, and it being there in a low intensity way: This phase carried on to my work life. But the intensity was less. But this was a good phase to work on this problem. I tried to reason myself out of this. I told myself things like: "Why do I need to fear people? They are just here to listen to me. Something which I can offer them. And if I am sincere and honest and humble, then what do I need to be afraid of? They won't hit me?" . Another thing which helped me do well is thinking that, I will start the presentation, by confessing my extreme nervousness, and request the audience to bear with me. Surprisingly, this relaxed me a great deal. I never had to do it, as I felt better just by thinking this.

Another thing, which helped me was prayer. I feel in a more equanimous state by the act of praying - and I have made suitable modifications in my thought that I am conversing with nature, instead of God. (I don't believe in a lot of aspects of religion. But also believe and have experienced solace by it. Agnostic. Full disclosure.)

A dormant demon?: Talking about now. I don't feel that intense kind of anxiety now, in speaking. And thankfully so. I think Startup life also helps in that regard. As there are hardly any BS presentations, or needing to say things you don't believe in. If you have to speak to VC, its to get them to invest. If you speak to an audience, you want to describe your idea, which you believe in. And also being honest, I felt, helped a lot. As it puts you in the right frame of mind. So of course nervousness is there, but much less. I was lucky to speak in front of a rather large audience in the early stages of this Startup journey, and I did not feel as anxious. But once you have experienced, this kind of anxiety. You can never be too sure. It can surface, at any unprepared moment, in the middle of an answer, when you grow self-conscious. I guess the simple key is to acknowledge it, and try to reason it out. Even if you stutter or stammer. Apologize with a smile. Take a deep breath. Think. And speak to the human (or humans) who only want to know what you think. Cheers!

Edit: typos

Figured this would be a writeup by Han Solo. I was wrong.

"Let it go, let it GO!"

This article was not what I expected it to be. I thought it would be about someone freezing to death in Antarctica or Siberia. Perhaps freeze was the wrong word choice.