So without doing anything either illegal or unethical, things that could lose me my current job, how does one build up the skills and experience?
So without doing anything either illegal or unethical, things that could lose me my current job, how does one build up the skills and experience?
You should probably start by picking an area that you're interested in (e.g. web, infrastructure, mobile) as whilst there's some commonalities each area has it's own toolset and specific areas of focus.
For learning there's things like https://pentesterlab.com/ , https://www.offensive-security.com/metasploit-unleashed/
For practicing legally , a lot of CTF competitions make use of skills which are useful for penetration testers, also places like vulnhub https://www.vulnhub.com/ have downloadable challenge machines that you can run in a VM.
In terms of meeting up with people in the industry, look out for local Defcon chapters or B-Sides conferences, both of which tend to be free or low cost and have some good content.
For baby steps I would advise starting with nessus, and metasploit then targeting virtual machines that you build on your own home network.
edit: the metasploit site asks for payment in the form of a donation to charity, so I'll take closer look at that one first. Now that's a link worth sharing.