>I’m Daniel Stenberg, a network hacker working for Mozilla.
Sigh. Why does everyone have to be a hacking rockstar ninja? What's wrong with not using a word that has negative connotations to the rest of the world, and just calling yourself a developer/engineer?
I would argue there are practical rules to follow depending on your audience. In this case it seems fine but obviously can cause issues with the modern interpretation of what hacker means.
Who cares that some ignoramus directs her anger at him? Do you also think "hackers" or software devs shouldn't have long hair or listen to rock music?
So nowhere. It's on the public internet which is where 'the general public' is likely to see it so suggesting that you don't use some phrase where 'the public' can't see it in practically means you can't use it anywhere.
I know the last thing I want to do is self censor myself everywhere because someone somewhere might get offended.
OP tried to get around that by trying to say that when you could be heard by 'them' you shouldn't use those words, but this is the public internet. You are always communicating in the presence of those that will be offended.
Likewise, editing a paper to remove grammatical errors is also not "self-censorship." It's improving the clarity of your message.