Is this all a round about way of saying you don't believe in quantum entanglement? Because that would be simpler and I wouldn't bother arguing.
(Obviously you don't mean necessarily literally on paper)
Do you claim that the predictions that are made about what is observed are false, or that the interpretation is wrong, or?
Surely you don't mean that by interpreting it in a particular way, it causes different things to happen, so I can't think of anything other than those two.
Of course that does make me think about forking processes and copy-on-write, and the idea that our reality is just a simulation in a computer and that maybe creating new universes is not as expensive as we might at first think...
I admit I'm still in the process of learning and figuring this stuff out.