This is timely, as I’ve just gone through the worst onboarding I've ever experienced. It took two very long days to install an OS on a machine and get it to boot (I had to assembly my computer and then use the corporate installer, which failed multiple times with errors like “an unknown error occurred”). It then took me about a week to run the local project’s “hello world” (I was initially pointed to documentation that had been deprecated for months, and then when I found the right documentation it was incomplete and out of date). The actual process to get there was hilariously baroque; for example (if my email records are correct and I didn’t get duplicate emails from the system), I must have clicked through 18 EULAs to get a subset of the permissions I need. I promise, that’s worse than it sounds since the form to do so took more time to click through than you can imagine. It was a month before I could effectively do any work at all.
I originally thought that I was just unlucky, but when I asked around I found that I had an above average experience, at least among people near me who started recently. Unlike many other folks, I was actually able to get a username/alias, a computer, and an office. I don’t know what folks without a username do since they can’t even start clicking through the necessary EULAs to get permissions to do stuff, let alone do any actual work.
I’m not sure how it is in other parts of the company, but if you imagine that it’s similar and do some back of the envelope math on how many people get onboarded and how much losing a month (or more) of time costs, it comes out to N million dollars for a non-trivial N. And that’s just the direct cost of the really trivial stuff. It’s hard to calculate the cost of the higher level stuff that’s mentioned in the article, but I suspect that’s even more expensive.