I was miserable, isolated and alone - because I was focused on mathematical symbols instead of the people around me.
When I started considering that P didn't equal NP, it was the same time that I started thinking about and seriously considering the idea that there was somethign more powerful about groups of people than a single intellect.
A single turing machine is like a single mind; a quantum computer is like the thoughts of an entire society.
If P = NP, it suggests that smartest guy in the room always wins. If P doesn't equal NP - it means a group can overpower a single smart person.
There's a lot of ego in thinking the former.