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I think his suggestion is that he is drinking the Kool-Aid while internally questioning whether it is a good idea for him to be drinking the Kool-Aid. Which, I agree, is sort of a contradiction, but a parseable one.

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This makes more sense. He's basically saying, "I love this, but let's not get too carried away." I now see where that comment's coming from!

Thanks. Nit-picking again, but drinking the Kool-Aid does mean "unquestioning, ... without criticism" implying that those who are drinking wouldn't have such reservations. That's what I was confused about. Oh well. Language is evolving, what else is new.

It might not have been the original meaning but when you think of a cult member drinking the Kool Aid (that will kill them) they might be a true believer with no doubt in their mind, but they could also be someone who isn't sure but is being led by peer pressure ao on.

When you accuse yourself of drinking the kool-aid, (or discuss yourself drinking the kool-aid), it carries along a degree of self-recognition: "sure, maybe I'm drinking the kool-aid, but at least I realize it".

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